CATANZARO, Italy to FALMOUTH, Maine – True fact. I’ve always, I can prove it, always, wanted one of those tiny putt putt Italian trucks, the venerable Ape. And now. Our friend Paul has one! And I don’t! Paul’s not only got one, he’s got one in Falmouth, Maine.
TOY TRUCK, TOY TRUCK, TOY TRUCK
Yes, this baby blue bundle of toy truck was parked right outside our office and it is a real live Ape. English speaking people would, on seeing those three letters together say “ape” like, you know, our revered ancestors we supposedly evolved from. Italians say it like “aaah, pay” and it means, “bee”. Like bumble bee or honey bee. Ape is from those fine folks at Piaggio who brought you the Vespa. Which, by the way, means “wasp.” See a pattern forming? Why, oh why, you ask, do they do this? Bee cause of how they all sound.
Enough of the entomology of the insect-based brand names, let’s gather round all the real gear heads and talk about how this lost ape found itself in Yarmouth, Maine an ocean away from its native habitats of downtown Rome, Florence, Torino, Naples and beyond.
An almost seamless, zero degrees of separation chain of events seems to have caused this turn of events. Paul saw the classic Vespa on display at our office (from the legendary T. Turner Collection) and as guys trying to avoid real work will do, we got to talking and discovered we both really aspired to an Ape, someday. To me, someday means some day. A day off in the future. Many, if not most people go on vacation and come back with pictures of the Trevi Fountain, or the the Roman Coliseum. I have pages of Polaroids of Apes as far back as 1982 when this affliction first manifested itself on an extended stay in Calabria. And I even have brochures with prices scribbled on the back, in lira, by our friend Giuseppi. He got tired of hearing about it and called our bluff and said “So, order one, already. I’ll get it shipped over. Che problema?” How much was 4,182,000 lira worth in 1982? Whatever, twenty five years later I’m still musing about an Ape. Twenty five minutes later on the other hand, Paul is not musing about one, he’s driving about in one and there it is in our parking lot. Ok, maybe it was a month or so, but still. No grass growing under this ape.
MOM, ALL the OTHER kids have an ape. PLEEEZE?
When we were looking at the Vespa here, I mentioned Sean Potter just down the street here, who ALSO has one. Paul found Sean and found out there had been an Ape on eBay and before you could say “andiamo” he had made a deal and roped another friend into a road trip to Jersey to pick this one up. It is a 1982 coincidentally. With almost no miles on it. Or kilometers either.
Paul had the great good sense to figure out how to rationalize this. It is not a new toy. This, my friends, is a business expense. Yes, yes it is. Really. He’s importing his family’s great wines from Italy, and this will be his delivery truck for the greater Falmouth area. Stay tuned to this bat channel to see the graphics we’ve designed for this baby ape. Coming soon. You’ll be the first to see the reveal.
Float like a butterfly,
Sting like an ape.
For anyone who wants to see all the apes in the world, check out the Gallerie on this Ape site. If Vespas are your cup of tea, there seem to be an amazing stream of them on eBay coming in from Viet Nam. Oh, yes we’ve been stung by this ape/vespa bug. Look what you’ve started Paul. First, your totally addictive rose’s and now planting the ape seed in my mind.
We’re leaving for Italy in less than two weeks. And you know, I think there is plenty of room for a wild ape or two in our cantina . . .
See you in Italy,
Stew Vreeland
Oh, I have to share this. No, this is not a photo taken on a back road of Umbria. But just something designed to give me quantum nostalgia for the back roads of Umbria. A perfect little purple Ape, separated at birth from its homeland and somehow, someway transported to an apple orchard in northern Maine? I slowed down, shook my head and turned right around on a side street in Portland, Maine when I saw this beauty. Vintage 1969. And who knows why they call these Apes and their cousins, the motor scooters, Vespas? You in the back. That is correct. It is because of the sound they make. Like Bees and Wasps, those Apes and Vespas buzz up and down the streets of Italy. And at least one street in Portland. 